Sunday, March 16, 2014

Caught Up On Life

Spring break is this upcoming week and since daycare kids have left Friday afternoon, I've kicked it into high gear. There's been LOTS of organizing (which is pretty much a constant thing around here), cleaning, going through outgrown toys, clothes, shoes, donating, furniture buying, rearranging, and doing all of the little projects that have built up over the past 6+ months, which happens to be the last time I took a week off.

It's not that we haven't wanted or needed to get these things done, it's just a constant struggle to stay on top of things. Since Friday night, I've felt an increasing feeling of guilt coming over me. Should we have been making more time for these things? Should we have been "playing" less during our free time? Maybe we could actually walk in our basement if we kept on top of things. Maybe I could shut our closet doors if I had gone through clothes and rearranged the bedroom (something that has needed done for almost a solid year) before now.

Every night after the daycare kids have long left and my three minis have finally drifted off to sleep, I spend a good hour or two, depending on what needs done, cleaning the toys, living room, kitchen, sweeping, vacuuming, and the never ending laundry. I have very little time to do anything extra unless I were to put off doing one of those everyday chores, which just means I would then have double the work the next day. When I actually take a moment to think about it, it can seem a little overwhelming and I'm sure to those who don't live my life, it is.

We could do these things on the weekends, but what fun is that? The last thing my kids want to do is sit at home and watch us do our projects. My kids don't care if their laundry is folded, if our basement is a mess, and they really have no care if any of these projects are done or not. Honestly, after being at home all week the last thing I want to do is stay at home and do these things (casualty of working at home I suppose). How do I find a balance between working on these things and having fun? Our weekends for the last 6 months have been pretty darn epic if you ask me....I mean, epic by Iowa fun standards.

This is when it hits me. In several more years, years that seem to be going by way too fast, that's when I can take the time to do these projects. There will come a time when our minis will no longer want our epic fun weekends, to go to the zoo for the umpteenth time every summer, they will no longer need our full, undivided attention. Until then, I'll live with the piled high junk in the basement, the thought of needing to hold a garage sale and not following through, I'll watch my To Do List grow but gladly hide it in a draw when it gets too long in favor of our Fun To Do Lists each season.

This spring break, we have a fair mixture of things to get done and having fun on our Spring Break To Do List. I've crossed a few of the organizing projects off of the list in order to fit in all of our fun we wanted. I'm quite certain I'll feel that guilt sweeping over me from time to time in the future, as it does us all. I'm also quite certain I'll always struggle with finding that balance that I'm not quite sure anyone has figured out. I'm also quite certain all I'll need to do is think back to our epic fun weekends, the look on my mini's faces, the happiness and hopefully the guilt will subside.....until I stub my toe on a box in an overly crowded basement.